


To Nothing

by LostCauses (Anteros)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Fluff, M/M, canonverse, eruri - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-24
Updated: 2017-07-24
Packaged: 2018-12-06 03:28:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11591982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anteros/pseuds/LostCauses
Summary: “It’s just one day Erwin.”The commander places his head in his hands, rubbing small circles into his temples where he can feel the tension building.  The headache has been plaguing him all week, much like his captain, with whom he is fast loosing patience.  Erwin takes a deep breath and counts to five.Levi tries, and fails, to persuade Erwin to stop working for one special day.





	To Nothing

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mtalksfic](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mtalksfic/gifts), [gouguruheddo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gouguruheddo/gifts).



“It’s just one day Erwin.” 

The commander places his head in his hands, rubbing small circles into his temples where he can feel the tension building. The headache has been plaguing him all week, much like his captain, with whom he is fast loosing patience. Erwin takes a deep breath and counts to five. 

“Levi, I’ve told you before, I don’t have time to take a day off. If we’re to secure funding for our next expedition, this proposal has to be on Zackley’s desk by the end of the week at the very latest.” 

“You think Zackley will care if the shitty report is one day late?”

“And,” Erwin continues pointedly, “I still have to see to the quartermaster’s accounts, the armoury inventory and Hanji’s latest…whatever the hell Hanji’s latest thing is.”

“Tch. That can wait.” 

The two men glare at each other across the room. Levi folded into a compact knot of annoyance on the couch opposite Erwin’s desk, arms and legs tightly crossed, one foot bouncing in irritation. The commander sitting behind his desk in his shirtsleeves, a smudge of ink on his sleeve, fatigue painting dark circles under his eyes. 

“It’s your birthday on Friday, for humanity’s sake take one day off. It’s not going to fucking kill you. Though I might,” Levi mutters darkly under his breath, “stubborn bastard.” 

“Captain!” Erwin snaps, temper giving way. “I do not have time for such frivolities!”

The air in the office stills, thick with tension. Levi’s brows narrow dangerously over dark eyes but Erwin catches a glimpse of the hurt flickering below the surface and something twists in his chest.

“Levi,” he starts again in a more conciliatory tone. “I’m sorry, I just really need to get this done. I can’t take a day off and I don’t want anything for my birthday, it doesn’t matter anyway, all I want is a little peace and quiet to get this proposal finished.” 

Levi glares at him for a moment longer, before standing abruptly. 

“Fine.” He replies tightly, and then he’s gone, closing the door behind him with just a little more force than necessary. Erwin stares at the door in exasperation before returning to his work. 

He sees little of Levi over the next two days but he doesn’t really have time to think about it as the proposal is proving to be more troublesome than usual. Justifying winter expeditions is always difficult; the costs higher, the risks greater, supplies and resources stretched even thinner. With the deadline looming, Erwin has been up half the night trying to shave every last penny off the budget. By the time the grey dawn is creeping over Wall Rose, the proposal is looking a lot more convincing but the body of the report still needs to be edited and proofed. Erwin sighs, rubbing at tired gritty eyes. It’s still an hour before reveille so he resolves to make a start on the editing before sending down to the mess for coffee. 

He’s barely reached the end of the first page before he’s interrupted by a soft knock at the door. Erwin looks up, surprised. No one but the watch should be up at this hour, no one but Levi that is, and Levi never knocks. 

“Come,” Erwin calls. 

The door opens and a sleepy looking soldier carrying a tray enters.

“Coffee sir.”

“Oh.” Erwin stares at the soldier in some confusion. “Thank you. Just put it there.”

The soldier places the tray on the desk, salutes and leaves. Erwin continues staring after her. He must have asked for early morning coffee to be sent up at some stage the previous evening but he has no recollection of it. Perhaps not surprising given he’s been burning the candle at both ends for the last fortnight. Fatigue can do strange things to a man. Erwin pours a cup; the coffee is hot, black and strong, just how he likes it, not the usual lukewarm dishwater habitually served in the mess. Erwin sighs gratefully and turns his attention back to the report. 

The commander works right through till mid-morning uninterrupted and it’s only when he’s startled by a knock at the door that he realises it’s almost time for his morning meetings to start. To say it’s unusual to work through till after eleven without a continual string of interruptions would be something of an understatement. Erwin gets up and walks over to the door to stretch his legs. Opening it, he finds a nervous looking clerk clutching a sheet of paper. 

“Ummm…message from the quartermaster sir,” the clerk thrusts the paper towards Erwin, “he’s asked to cancel the meeting, a shipment of supplies has arrived early and he needs to see that it’s stored and the inventory amended.” 

Erwin takes the sheet and squints at the quartermaster’s barely legible spider scrawl. Well, that’s one less thing to worry about. 

“And the armourer also sends his apologies,” the clerk continues, “he won’t be able to meet with you today, he’s been,” he pauses, clearing his throat, “called away.” 

“Called away?” Erwin looks up from the quartermaster’s indecipherable note. 

“Yes sir, that’s what he said sir.” The clerk shifts nervously from foot to foot.

“Called away where?” 

“He didn’t say sir, just called away.” 

Erwin frowns and there’s an audible in take of breath from the clerk. 

“All right. If that’s what he said. Dismissed.” 

The clerk salutes hastily and almost trips over his feet as he hurries off down the hall. 

Erwin is still frowning as he returns to his desk. He briefly considers going in search of the armourer, as he can see no reason for him to have been “called away”, however there’s no denying that he can make good use of the extra hours the cancelled meetings have afforded him. He might even manage to get the report finished and off to Zackley by the end of the day. Picking up his pen he glances out the window, in the distance he can see Levi putting the cadets through their paces on the training course. The tiny figures are too far away to see clearly, but he would recognise Levi at any distance. Nothing and no one moves through the air with such poise and grace. Erwin watches, captivated, hating himself for the pang of jealousy that curls in his gut. He would sell his right arm to be out there on the training course with Levi, rather than being here, chained to his desk. Still, he is the commander and he has a job to do, just as his captain does. It’s Levi’s responsibility to ensure the cadets have a fighting chance of staying alive once they step outside the walls, and it’s Erwin’s to plan the expeditions that will send them out there to die. Sometimes he wonders at the futility of it all. Shaking his head to dislodge such morbid thoughts, Erwin turns back to the report. 

It’s just after lunch hour when Erwin receives his next interruption.

“Hey Erwin, brought you this.” Hanji announces as they breeze into his office and drop a small packet onto his desk. 

“What’s that?” Erwin stares down at the crumpled paper package. 

“It’s lunch!”

“Lunch?” 

“Sandwiches. Sorry they got a bit squashed, I ran into Moblit on my way up from the mess and stopped to show him…well never mind that. Eat.”

Erwin gingerly peels open the greasy packet, which does indeed contain two rather squashed sandwiches. 

“Thank you Hanji, that’s very kind of you. I suppose you want to discuss that plan you raised for…what was the plan for again?” 

“Oh no,” Hanji waves one hand airily. “That’s what I was coming up here to tell you. I’ve come up with another plan. A _better_ plan. I need to kick a few ideas around with Moblit first before I… anyway that can wait. Catch you later boss!”

Erwin shakes his head as the door slams shut behind the departing Hanji. He gingerly lifts one of the sandwiches out of the packet, the bread is soft and fresh.

By late afternoon the report is complete. Erwin sits back and runs ink stained fingers through his hair. He stretches where he sits, cracking his neck and easing out some of the knots in his shoulders. If he gets the report to a despatch rider now, it’ll be on Zackley’s desk before he leaves at the end of the day. And that’s when Erwin remembers that he forgot to send for a courier. 

“Shit,” he groans.

He briefly considers sending Levi, who can ride as fast as any courier. He would go without hesitation but it rankles with Erwin to treat his captain as a glorified errand boy. Instead he calls the clerk. 

“Yes, sir?” the young clerk looks marginally less nervous than earlier in the day. 

“I need you to send out for a despatch courier…” Erwin starts, but before he can finish, the clerk is interrupting him. 

“The courier’s already waiting sir.”

“Waiting?”

“Yes sir, down stairs sir,” the clerk replies, looking slightly confused. “He’s been here all afternoon, waiting to take your report to the Commander-in-Chief.” 

“Is that so?” 

“Yes sir.” 

As the clerk departs with the report, Erwin glances out the window. The training grounds are dark and empty. 

With the report despatched and the remainder of his meetings cancelled, Erwin has a rare opportunity to kick back a little. He takes a long bath, shaves carefully, and changes into clean fresh clothes, dropping his ink-stained shirt into the laundry. By the time he decides to join the rest of the Corps in the mess hall for dinner, he’s feeling almost relaxed. 

“Happy Birthday Erwin!” Hanji slaps him on the back as he takes a seat beside them. “Celebrating in style I see?” 

“Oh,” Erwin smiles, genuinely amused, “is it today? So it is, I had no word of it!”

“First sign of old age.” Mike chips in. “You’re over the hill old man.”

“It’s a fascinating phenomena, memory loss in the elderly…” Hanji starts enthusiastically, only to be interrupted by an apologetic looking Moblit.

“I’m sure Hanji didn’t mean to imply that you’re elderly commander.” 

“That’s all right,” Erwin replies, “though at my age, I’m not sure birthdays are anything to celebrate.”

“Oh come on Erwin,” Hanji elbows him in the ribs, “you’ve survived another year in the Survey Corps, that’s definitely worth celebrating.” 

“Yes, I guess you’re right,” Erwin concedes. “Where’s Levi?” he adds, looking around for his familiar frowning face. 

“Dunno,” Mike replies with a shrug, “he’s been about all day, not sure where he’s got to now, still busy I guess. Anyway, never mind Levi, are we going to celebrate this birthday or not? Pass your glass over.” 

Mike produces a bottle of brandy from his jacket and proceeds to pour a generous measure into Erwin’s glass.

The evening passes in companionable reminiscence, Mike and Erwin sharing stories from their trainee days as the mess hall empties around them. It’s late by the time the brandy is finished and they’re yawning round the table. 

“I guess we should call it a night,” Erwin slurs slightly as he drains his glass. 

Mike lifts the brandy bottle and tilts it to the light. 

“There’s still some left, not worth keeping it, you may as well take it with you for a night cap.” 

“Here, take these too,” Hanji slides two glasses across the table. Erwin blinks at them, Hanji just smiles, nose crinkling under their glasses. 

Erwin is pleasantly warmed by brandy and companionship as he makes his way up the stairs. He’s tempted to go straight to his quarters and fall gratefully into bed, but he has one last responsibility to see to before the day is out. Stopping outside Levi’s door he takes a deep breath and knocks softly. 

“It’s open.” The familiar low voice replies from the other side of the door.

Erwin raises one eyebrow, Levi rarely if ever leaves his door unlocked. He enters to find Levi sitting at his small writing desk, which is scattered with papers and journals. Among them, Erwin recognises the quartermaster’s account ledger, the scrawled rows and columns neatly annotated with Levi’s beautiful cursive script. 

“I’m sorry are you busy?” Erwin asks. 

“Not really.” Levi replies, discretely pushing the ledger under a pile of papers. Erwin can’t help noticing that he looks tired and a little worn. He’s sitting in his shirtsleeves, collar undone, cravat hanging over the back of his chair, the shadows under his eyes darker and more pronounced than usual.

“May I?” Erwin gestures with the brandy bottle to the only other chair in the room.

“Feel free.” Levi replies, expression impassive.

Erwin places the glasses on the edge of the desk, pours the remainder of the brandy, and passes one glass to Levi. He swirls the amber liquid in his hand, wrinkling his nose slightly. 

“It seems my thanks are in order,” Erwin starts. Levi just shrugs. 

“Thank you for everything you did today. It was enormously helpful and very thoughtful of you.”

“I didn’t do anything,” Levi replies evenly, but with air of determination, daring Erwin to challenge him.

A lesser man than Erwin might have backed down. _Any_ man but Erwin might have backed down, but Erwin is not just any man. 

“Really?” he eyes his captain sceptically. 

“Nope. Nothing. That’s what you wanted right?” 

“Ah yes, you’re right,” Erwin laughs softly, “I did say that didn’t I? Nothing but peace and quiet to finish the report.” 

“Well then, here’s to nothing.” 

Levi raises his glass and tilts it towards Erwin. 

“To nothing.” Erwin replies, and maybe it’s just the brandy, but he can’t help noticing the way his captain’s lips curve into a small smile where they kiss the edge of the glass.


End file.
